Tuesday, August 27, 2002

Many Unhappy Returns
The Forrester for Senate campaign has fun with Da Torch:
Happy Birthday, Senator Torricelli!

(HAMILTON, August 26) - Forrester for Senate campaign manager Bill Pascoe - celebrating Senator Robert Torricelli's 51st birthday today - today issued the following statement:

"What do you get the guy who already has EVERYTHING? He has a Rolex, a big screen TV, a $1.225 million 'Torch Mahal' Hunderdon County compound (where, by using a loophole he once condemned, he pays a paltry $198 in property taxes), a jammin' CD player, plenty of snazzy European designer suits, plush oriental rugs, antique grandfather clocks, a couple of brass statues, lucrative insider trading stock tips, and envelopes loaded with spending money.

"You know, he's received so many gifts of late that whatever we'd send would be a pittance. Plus, we have to save our pennies to buy expensive New York and Philadelphia television ads to respond to Mr. Torricelli's slash-and-burn, sleaze-and-destroy, say-anything campaign of misinformation and deceit.

"So we considered just sending a letter - but, of course, he's already received one of those too, from his own colleagues! Then we threw around the idea of showing up at Mr. Torricelli's campaign office with a birthday cake - with a heavy metal file stuck in the middle of it, just in case he should ever need it.
$198 in property taxes on a million dollar house! What a guy!