LOL! Barack Obama's Aunt Zeituni Has Written a Book!

Don't Cry for Aunt Zeituni

Auntie Zeituni has written a book. It’s called “Tears of Abuse,” on account of how tough she’s had it.

Have I read it? Of course not. Have you read her nephew’s best-seller — Dreams from My Ghostwriter, I mean Father? No one has — it’s sold millions of copies, but until two weeks ago, not a single reader got far enough into it to learn that Obama was a dog-eater with “composite” girlfriends.

Anyway, I have the press release on “Tears of Abuse,” which describes Auntie Zeituni’s journey to the United States “where she faces the unthinkable; failing health and quarantined in a hospital while on vacation in a foreign country.”

Vacation? Surely she meant to say “welfare.”

“As her story unfolds she becomes a resident of (a) homeless shelter and a subject of deportation.”

How dare they! Just because she’s an illegal alien, they want to deport her.

...

Auntie Zeituni was victimized in Kenya but, believe it or not, “she was later victimized in the U.S.”

Talk about victimization — do you realize, you actually have to go down to the welfare office to apply for the dole? The welfare office doesn’t make house calls. Not yet anyway. Her nephew hasn’t been re-elected.

But Auntie Zeituni’s story has a happy ending.

“ ‘Tears of Abuse’ reveals how this remarkable woman turns the unfathomable into triumph.”

Public housing, on the dole — what else would you call it but a triumph?

I wonder if Zeituni got Bill Ayres to ghost write? Anyhow, while it hasn't made Amazon you can get this amazing tome by sending Zeituni $19.99 at her Web site.

While you are there, check out the photos of the gala book launch in Cleveland for lots of unintentional humor. Hey, do you think if we gave Zeituni enough money she would just go home where she belongs? Nah, the USA is the promised land for the Obama clan and they're all living large on the backs of the real citizens and taxpayers.

Liz "Spreading Bull" Warren isn't even 1/32 Cherokee

Genealogist for Elizabeth Warren 1/32 Cherokee claim goes silent, source document shown false

There is nothing left of the claim that Elizabeth Warren is 1/32 Cherokee.  The documentary sources have been debunked, and the genealogist and genealogical society which originated the story and upon whom the Warren campaign relies are not talking.

It’s now time for the media to stop spreading fiction.

I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for the latter. As for Fauxcohantas herself, it turns out that Liz Warren was a Native American diversity poster girl at the University of Pennsylvania as well as Harvard.

Who do you know that is better off today than they were four years ago?

The only person I know who is better off today than he was four years ago is President Obama.

He's making more money, living in a bigger house and playing more golf. And when his wife goes on a shopping spree with her girlfriends, it's to Spain on the taxpayer's dime.

If you asked President Obama if he's better off today, he'd say, "Hell, yeah! And we don't want it to stop!"

Michael Reagan

"With Dicks in, all 6 WA congressional Democrats favor repeal of gay-marriage ban"

That certainly explains a lot.

Update: the headline is now altered but will live forever in screen captures.

Obama comes out of the closet

We all had our suspicions. The rumors, the effeminate gestures, the kids that look like Jeremiah Wright.

Yes, inside Barack Obama was a woman trying to get out.

So Barack called together his crack team of advisors who made the political calculations:

Given the fact that Obama is the gayest straight man ever to hold the office of the president, I fail to see what the problem is in his coming out of the closet on a rocket.

Oh, wait, can it be that African-American church ladies and gentlemen do not support the idea of homosexual marriage? Why would Obama care? Those groups are doomed to vote for him no matter what. In addition, those groups do not, as groups, have a lot of money after years of record Obama-induced African-American unemployment. In contrast the amount of money gay groups are expected to pony up for his campaign coffers is, in Hollywood alone, gigantic. When has money not trumped spirituality in Obama's career? Short answer, never.

And the result:

Obama's only worry now is what his Imam will say.

Better skip the trips to Muslim countries, Barry.

Another tale of the early Barack Obama

All the recent revelations from Barack Obama's apparently mostly unread bestseller, Dreams of My Father, like his dog eating and composite girl friend that strangely resembles Bill Ayres' girl friend remind me of my favorite Barack Obama story :

"So I said to my mother, 'How come I'm black and you're white?' She replied, 'Don't even go there Barack! From what I can remember about that party, you're lucky you don't bark!'"

Who knew they had toga parties at the University of Hawaii?