Help out lard brain Michael Moore

AndrewR gets in the spirit of the thing with Uh, Michael Moore, Uh, Wants To Hear, Uh, Like, Uh, About Your, Uh, Problems Getting, Uh, Health Care:

Dear Mr. Moore,

Three years ago I got my balls caught in my bike chain at an antiwar rally, and my subsequent health care experience was horrible right from beginning to end. To start, the paramedics were completely unprofessional. It took fifteen minutes to convince them that I wasn't a woman having my period. No matter how many times I told them that there's no law against men being members of Code Pink, they just kept trying to give me tampons and leaving to go help the people in the SUV we'd set on fire.

There's more hilarity by following the link, but speaking of Michael Moore and health care - I wonder how he's doing with the terminal flatulence?