It looks like the PR folks vigourously applied the clue bat to Sheryl "Stinkfingers" Crow and she now claims her "one sheet wipe" comments were just a joke, but all her other airbrained global warming rantings are for real. Yeah, right.
She also opines that the White House Correspondents Association dinner where she and wacko pal Laurie David tried to mug Karl Rove was somehow "a dinner designed specifically to encourage conversations between people from different worlds." When Stinkfingers says "different worlds," she really means different planets. Anyhow, Fake Steve Jobs again gets the best line:
I'm no fan of Karl Rove, but honestly if this ditz and Larry David's greentard wife started hassling me during dinner and lecturing me about "science," I'd tell them to get stuffed too.
Now I understand why Lance Armstrong ditched her. I wouldn't go near that coochie either. I'm trying to remember if I shook her hand when I met her. I'm pretty sure I did. Oh God. I just threw up in my mouth.
I don't know about you, but I sure think it's swell that a couple of high maintenance bimbos like these two are touring the country telling folks that using only one sheet of toilet paper and wiping their mouths on their sleeves during dinner will prevent global warming. Aside from the novelty of their bizarre nostrums, there's a lot of unintended humor as well:
David (4/20, Charlottesville): Sheryl couldn't be with me tonight because of a previous commitment [Crow traveled to New York for a show that wasn't part of the tour] but luckily rock stars have rock star friends
I guess it makes sense to her and I'm sure ole Sheryl rode her bicycle up to New York and back. Lear jet anyone? Continuing for the best part:
Tonight, I spoke outside the gorgeous Charlottesville pavilion, in front of a couple of thousand slightly inebriated college men (there to see the wonderful Robert Randolph and the Family Band) who were forced to sit through the opening act . . . me. Truly, it was one of the most challenging 20 minutes of my life. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw guys yawning, I heard kids saying "where's the music?" and I think I heard the "b" word. I rushed through the speech and when I walked off the stage I immediately burst into tears. Not because I took anything personally but because it was so clear how much work is still to be done. Tonight served as a stark reminder that social change is a journey and I learned tonight that not every stop is going to be easy.
Don't let the door hit your unwiped global warmer on the way out, biatch.
Watch out Chuck, if you lay down with the nutroots, you'll get up with a STD!
Even the Washington Post had some choice words for Pelosi's Pratfall in Damascus where she buttered up that disgusting thug, Bashar Assad:
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) offered an excellent demonstration yesterday of why members of Congress should not attempt to supplant the secretary of state when traveling abroad. After a meeting with Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad in Damascus, Ms. Pelosi announced that she had delivered a message from Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert that "Israel was ready to engage in peace talks" with Syria. What's more, she added, Mr. Assad was ready to "resume the peace process" as well. Having announced this seeming diplomatic breakthrough, Ms. Pelosi suggested that her Kissingerian shuttle diplomacy was just getting started. "We expressed our interest in using our good offices in promoting peace between Israel and Syria," she said.Only one problem: The Israeli prime minister entrusted Ms. Pelosi with no such message. "What was communicated to the U.S. House Speaker does not contain any change in the policies of Israel," said a statement quickly issued by the prime minister's office. In fact, Mr. Olmert told Ms. Pelosi that "a number of Senate and House members who recently visited Damascus received the impression that despite the declarations of Bashar Assad, there is no change in the position of his country regarding a possible peace process with Israel." In other words, Ms. Pelosi not only misrepresented Israel's position but was virtually alone in failing to discern that Mr. Assad's words were mere propaganda.
Nonetheless, here at The Store we aren't too hard on Ms. P - after all she is merely fulfilling the dreams of all San Francisco Democrats:
Feel free to send Nancy a "You go, girl!" missive at sf.nancy@mail.house.gov. I'm sure she would appreciate it and if we get lucky, maybe when she "goes," she'll stay.
MPs have voted in favour of a government proposal to give each of them £10,000 to spend on websites to give the public more of an idea of what goes on in Parliament, the BBC reports.
House of Commons leader Jack Straw told MPs: "The purpose of this allowance is to contribute to better public understanding of what this Parliament is about and what it does. It's important for the health of our democracy for the public to know more about what we do."
The BBC reports that Mr Straw said websites funded by the extra £10,000 must not promote a party or politician, or raise funds, and must carry a message saying they are publicly paid for.
"not promote a politician" - They have to be kidding!
Speaking of which I was interested to see that Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr., finally broke down and accepted some public funds for an official Web site at http://www.house.gov/jackson/. Of course, he has still kept his old Web site at http://www.jessejacksonjr.org/ (which is still number 1 on Google), but even there he has killed the old book club link (where he sold screeds to those of his fans that could read) although he is still peddling Monarch VoteTech software. Hmm, he's also lost the scruffy beard and is looking more Obamaesque in his publicity snaps. Maybe he figured it was time to clean up his act and try for higher office! If a cheapjack hustler like Obama can do it, why not Jesse Jr.?
As another example, consider Obama's stirring tale for the Selma audience about how he had been conceived by his parents, Barack Obama Sr. and Ann Dunham, because they had been inspired by the fervor following the "Bloody Sunday" voting rights demonstration that was commemorated March 4. "There was something stirring across the country because of what happened in Selma, Ala.," he said, "because some folks are willing to march across a bridge. So they got together and Barack Obama Jr. was born. So don't tell me I don't have a claim on Selma, Ala. Don't tell me I'm not coming home to Selma, Ala."Woohoo! Unfortunately, what really was stirring was mostly Obama's ne'er-do-well father:
Obama was born in 1961, and the Selma march occurred four years later, in 1965. The New York Times reported that when the senator was asked about the discrepancy later that day, he clarified: "I meant the whole civil rights movement."Yeah, right. Read a little about Obama pere and see what you think. Hmm, maybe Dad thought it was a sit-in at the free lunch counter.
Fans of Attack of the Show will recognize Olivia Munn and her Munness, but those of you unfamiliar with Olivia will undoubtedly have her face (if not tongue) etched into your head after you watch this clip.