Monday, December 29, 2003

Oooo! Ow! Oooooo!

Howie says, "That smarts!" - Dean Wants Party Leader to Slow Rivals' Attacks
Complaining about the torrent of attacks raining down on him from his rivals for the Democratic presidential nomination, Howard Dean on Sunday criticized his party's national chairman, Terry McAuliffe, for not intervening to tone down the debate.
Bwahaha! Shall we dance?
"Right now those guys think we're the front-runner, so they're saying all this stuff, `He can't win'," Dr. Dean said. "How are they going to win?

"What I'm saying is I think we're the best and most capable candidate of beating George Bush because we're the only one that is exciting the party," he said.
Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just glad to see Howie? And the first person plural? Is that the royal "we", Dean-o?

In related news:
The United Nations Security Council today took up discussion of a resolution to protect Democrat presidential candidate Howard Dean from White House rivals John F. Kerry, Wesley Clark and Joseph I. Lieberman, whom Mr. Dean has dubbed the 'axis of Smeagol'.

"Like the two-faced character in the Lord of the Rings movies, Clark, Kerry and Lieberman make a show of party unity while verbally savaging me behind my back," said Mr. Dean. "Only the United Nations has the legitimacy to intervene for my protection. My own party has failed me."
Secretary-General Kofi Annan said he is hopeful that the Security Council will "leap to Mr. Dean's aid within the decade."
It's ScrappleFace.