Here's a new Nigerian scam

Via email the latest twist in Nigerian scams:

FROM Dr.(MRS) NANCY ABIAM
OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENCY
THE BENEFICIARY.
FRAUD VICTIMS REIMBURSEMENT.

Attention,

SCAM VICTIM REIMBURSEMENT.

I write to bring to your notice as a delegate from the Nigerian
Government Reimbursement committee under the strict supervision of the United
Nations to pay 230 Nigerian 419 scam victims the sum of $950,000.000.00 USD
(Nine Hundred Fifty Thousand Dollars) each. You are hereby listed as one of the
beneficiaries for this payment.You are expected to get back to us as soon as
possible for your immediate reimbursement.

As a result of this laudable recommedations,it is imperative to bring
to your notice that during the last U.N. meeting held in Abuja, Nigeria, it was
alarmed by so many countries around the world about loss of funds by various
foreigners to these scam artists operating in syndicates all over the world
today.In other to redeem the good image of our dear country,the President has
ordered the immediate payment of $950,000.000.00 USD each to the affected
victims in accordance with the U.N. directives.

(blah, blah, blah)

The only folks that the United Nations recommends paying that kind of money to are the crooks running the joint.

Today's Hoot!

Circulating via email:

2008 Democratic National Convention Agenda

7:00 pm Opening flag burning
7:15 pm Pledge of Allegiance to the U.N. (In Spanish)
7:20 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
7:25 pm Nonreligious prayer and worship with Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton
7:45 pm Ceremonial tree hugging
7:55 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast

8:00 pm How I Invented the Internet - Al Gore
8:15 pm Gay Wedding - Barney Frank presiding
8:35 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
8:40 pm Our Troops are War Criminals - John Kerry

9.00 pm Memorial service for Saddam and his sons - Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon

10:00 pm "Answering Machine Etiquette" - Alec Baldwin

11:00 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
11:05 pm Collection for the Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant fund - Barbara Streisand
11:15 pm Free the Freedom Fighters from Guantanamo Bay - Sean Penn
11:30 pm Oval Office Affairs - William Jefferson Clinton
11:45 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
11:50 pm How George Bush Brought Down the World Trade Towers - Howard Dean

12:15 am "Truth in Broadcasting Award" - Presented to Dan Rather by Michael Moore
12:25 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
12:30 am Satellite address by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
12:45 am Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Nancy Pelosi

1:00 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
1:05 am Coronation of Hillary Rodham Clinton
1:30 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
1:35 am Bill Clinton asks Ted to drive Hillary home

You mean they aren't going to invite Fidel Castro?

That Kevin Rudd is really a classy guy!

I don't think anything better summarizes the personality of Australian Labor leader Kevin Rudd than this video clip of the contemptible little git eating earwax in the middle of the Australian Parliament:




You probably don't want a closeup, but this one poses the interesting question, "What does he pick and eat when we're not looking?"

Some things you just can't make up

I'm glad some volunteer thought that Hillary would look like a "woman of the people" if she had her own customized apron, but the slogans certainly make for a target rich environment,


and the Freepers couldn't pass it up:


(Click on either to supersize Her Heinous.)

Dang, that's scary!

The bad news for Hillary is that the camera doesn't love her. The good news is that she doesn't need a mask for Halloween.

Remember Al Gore before you buy any product from Apple

Al Gore's primary job on Apple's board of directors (besides picking up his paycheck) seems to be to provide an aura of authenticity to the dubious report absolving Steve Jobs in the stock options backdating scandal. I guess that must have been a valuable service since Steve Jobs is boosting Big Weird Al for president and after the Goron was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize last week under other dubious circumstances, Apple decided to devote their home page for a couple of days to a little brown nosing (see above).

I know some folks that were interested in the Apple iPhone before it launched, but dropped it like a hot potato when they found out about Al's involvement in Apple. It may be hard to do the same if you are a longtime Macintosh user, but there's no excuse for buying any of Apple's consumer electronics gadgets like the iPod or iPhone because there are plenty of alternatives. Do some of the other manufacturers do silly stuff on behalf of Mother Gaia? Sure, but you have to pick off the fattest targets which are certainly Big Weird Al and Apple.

Hold off on the virgin sacrifice, the ozone hole is shrinking

Well, I'll be gobsmacked! Lookie here - Ozone Hole Shrinks by Nearly a Third:

After reaching a record high in 2006, scientists at the European Space Agency (ESA) reports that the ozone hole decreased by nearly a third in 2007.

Dang, where's my hairspray? But hold on a sec, the boffins warn not to cut off the flow of research grants just yet:

The agency also warned that the decrease is not a sign of permanent recovery, based on their research.

(Various butt covering deleted)

While the study by KNMI and the ESA indicates that the ozone hole recovery of this year was likely simply a temporary trend, international cooperation and increased public awareness will hopefully eventually lead to recovery such as 2007's being a permanent trend.

Here at the Country Store Research Institute, we've reached a different conclusion which is that none of these "crack" scientists have the faintest frickin' clue about what is really going on, but are only too happy to prescribe goofy socialist nostrums as a solution for their fantasy problems. Begone, twits!

Yep, that'll do it

Bubba says that when Hillary is elected, his job will be to raise the USA's image around the world. I think that's a swell idea since Bubba is so darn versatile. Not only can he swan about with the local dignitaries:


But he can also meet comfortably with the local natives in more intimate surroundings:

Phony combat vet Tom Harkin opens his pie hole again

(click to supersize the pondscum)

It's no secret that the lefties love the idea of antiwar combat vets. The only problem is that they seem to have a hard time finding any that aren't phony which seems to be the reason they have their panties in a knot over Rush Limbaugh bashing phony vet Jesse Macbeth. However, the best part is them trotting out phony combat vet Senator Tom Harkin to do their dirty work.

Of course, ole Tom is a tad shy about his falsifications - his staff tried to erase it off Wikipedia. But to let you know what kind of pondscum Tom Harkin and his wife Ruth are, take a gander at some of their other exploits. This lying punk should be embarassed to show his face in public and instead he and his wife are ripping off the citizens when they aren't betraying them.

I always enjoy a good cicada joke!

The cicada spends 17 years buried underground and then emerges to exclaim:

The answer of course is the ventral orifices of our "representatives" in Washington.