Thursday, July 29, 2004

Some things you just can't make up!

Text of Speech by Alexandra Kerry:
Our overzealous golden retriever got tangled in his leash and knocked the hamster cage off the dock. We watched as Licorice, the unlucky hamster bubbled down to a watery doom. That might have been the end of the story. But my dad jumped in, grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hamster and began to administer CPR. There were some reports of mouth-to-mouth, but, I admit that's probably a trick of memory. He was never quite right after that, but Licorice lived. Like I said, it may sound silly.
"He was never quite right after that" presumably refers to Licorice. Surprisingly, Alexandra's not the blonde one. She's the brunette of the see-through dress.

And Patrick Belton at OxBlog:
GOVERNMENT HEALTH WARNING FOR REP. PELOSI'S SPEECH: Parents, don't let your children grow up to have too many facelifts. If so, they'll run a risk of ending up with a perpetually surprised expression and an odd voice usually found in Disney films, and will have to seek refuge in odd coastal enclaves where the natives are surprisingly tolerant of such things.