Sunday, December 21, 2008

Today's hoot: Jesse Junior G-Man

Jon Kass at the Chicago Tribune says: Got corruption? Get Jesse Junior G-Man:
With so much news on the impeachment of Gov. Rod Blagojevich, I almost missed an incredible aspect of this amazing case:

The Jesse Junior G-Man Task Force to Fight Political Corruption thing.

So I called the federal building in Chicago and asked for the Jesse Junior G-Man Task Force.

"Pardon me?" asked a female federal employee.

Don't be obtuse. It's been all over the national TV news, U.S. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr. (D-Bud Light) working with the feds to fight corruption. So connect me to the Jesse Junior G-Man headquarters.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said.

It might not be a formal "task force." Perhaps there's another name for it, like Jesse Junior G-Man Blago Working Group. I'm a reporter. You can tell me.

"Sorry," she said. "No Junior G-Man office here."

Oh, c'mon! Just stop with your little bureaucratic games. The story was on TV. Jackson's been working with the feds, which means he's a good guy.

But she had nothing for me, so I called someone else.

"Jesse Junior G-Man? No," a guy said. "Not on this floor."

Just tell me. The Junior G-Man works in a high-tech complex buried deep underground, right? Behind a series of cool interlocking steel doors, protecting the Cone of Silence, right?
Nope, no trace of Jesse Jr. was to be found, but I did like the later comparison with the Soprano's Big Pussy. It's a good name for the little weasel too.