Friday, May 14, 2004

Today's Hoot

Over at c|net, Charles Cooper waxes lyrical about the computer industry - The rebirth of high-tech gabathons:
I was recently invited to a Silicon Valley kaffeeklatsch billed as the gathering for folks who want to find out what will define the next phase of the computer industry.

The conference fee ranges from $1,695 to $2,790, depending on whether I select the "invitation price," the "standard price" or the "walk-in" price. Besides absorbing the received wisdom of the dot-com headliners who are the big draw, I'm entitled to a free book the organizers are throwing into the package because, hey, they are just great sports.

Expensive mini-conferences fell out of fashion during the bust, but now that the tech business is on the mend, they are back with a vengeance.

I suppose that's a promising harbinger for the greater technology business. In any case, these slick e-brochures are flooding my in-box. One promises that I'll walk away with deep insights into the next stage in the development of the Internet; another claims to be the only venue that brings together the real movers and shakers. And so on and so forth.

Whether these gabathons are truly worth the price of admission is another matter. The answer may depend on whether you find yourself in a swanky resort, an exotic locale or some burg with a reputation for exceedingly naughty entertainment. Des Moines in December? Make mine Cannes in June.

But before bugging your boss for permission to jet off to Big Thinker's 2004 in Cancun, ponder Cooper's Law of Bloviation--which posits an inverse relationship between the number of speechifying multimillionaires on display and the improbability of deriving any benefits from sitting in the audience (besides logging quality snooze time).
There's more (including a blogging reference) by following the link, including this gem:
...most tech confabs follow a predictably rigid routine. A procession of chubsters follow each other on stage to yammer on about this or that. "Hey, we're rich, so (presumably) we know." It is not long before at least half the attendees slip into the corridor, where the conversation is infinitely more interesting. Plus, there's coffee.
...
In the meantime, I think I'm about to get uninvited to that kaffeeklatsch.
Er, probably not if you ante up the conference fee.

And while I get a laugh out of this stuff, the best part is that, unlike most things I complain about, it's fundamentally harmless. No one is making anyone attend these bun fights and no taxpayer dollars were consumed to make them happen.