We don't see many of them around here

Dear Howie,

I don't know what a "metrosexual" is either. But how damn dumb are you, that you claimed to be one without knowing? I mean, it could involve unnatural acts with a crappy car! That would put some rust on your socket wrench now wouldn't it?

Anyhow, if you are still confused about your metrosexuality, I suggest you take this online test discovered by Andrew Dodge. I took it and it told me that not only was I definitely not "metro", but that I was a Redneck! Dang! I thought I was a cowboy.

Thinking of you,
(in a non "metro" way, of course)

Yer pal down at the Store