Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Cookie's ringing the dinner bell down at the chuckwagon!

But not so fast, pardner - USDA to unveil Nutrition Frowny Face:
The U.S. Department of Agriculture is retiring the Nutrition Pyramid, that familiar triangle crammed with assorted comestibles which has graced a wall on every grade school in America for 15 years. To replace the outmoded pyramid, the USDA has designed a brand new icon to reflect the very latest culinarily correct nutrition standards.
For yet undisclosed reasons, the department rejected these designs, and approved the new icon to be unveiled tomorrow: the "Nutrition Frowny Face." This graphic, shaped like a stylized wincing human visage, segregates all foods into two broad categories: "Food You Can't Stand," and "Food You Like." The "Can't Stand" category is further subdivided into three groups: Smelly Food, Foreign Food, and Revolting Food. The government now recommends 18 daily servings of Food You Can't Stand, while Food You Like is not recommended at all in any quantity whatsoever.
Sheesh, leave it to the government to spoil the party. Hit the link for the pictures and I'll bet that you, like me, prefer the rejected Food Martini design.

Actually, that was Sean Gleeson having a little fun with the bureaucrats. The real deal is described in One-Size-Fits-All Food Pyramid Is Replaced:
Concerned about steadily expanding waistlines, the government flipped the food pyramid on its side, adding a staircase for exercise and giving consumers 12 individually-tailored models for improving their eating habits.

Inside the pyramid released Tuesday, rainbow-colored bands representing different food groups run vertically from the tip to the base.
Zzzz ... take a gander at it here. Even the Frowny Face is better - it actually has little pictures of food.

And while we're on the subject - Obesity Danger May Have Been Overstated:
CHICAGO - Being overweight is nowhere near as big a killer as the government thought, ranking No. 7 instead of No. 2 among the nation's leading preventable causes of death, according to a startling new calculation from the CDC.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimated Tuesday that packing on too many pounds accounts for 25,814 deaths a year in the United States. As recently as January, the CDC came up with an estimate 14 times higher: 365,000 deaths.
Gives you confidence, doesn't it? But what about all that whining about obesity that's been going on?
CDC Director Dr. Julie Gerberding said because of the uncertainty in calculating the health effects of being overweight, the CDC is not going to use the brand-new figure of 25,814 in its public awareness campaigns and is not going to scale back its fight against obesity.
Fake but accurate, I guess. I wonder if the bureaucrats pick up the clue phone when it rings?