As usual, the laugh's on us

Erstwhile Presidential tall timber, John F*ing Kerry, is at it again. As a followup to the NY Times theme story, ScrappleFace says the Lurchster is getting some help - Kerry Needs Theme, Gore Suggests 'Love Story'. Bwahaha! But there's someone else he can turn to - Al comes in from the cold: Sharpton gets a speaking role, Kerry gets new set of problems:

A few months ago, back when he was an active candidate for his party's nomination, Al Sharpton told Democratic National Committee Chairman Terry McAuliffe that he intended to speak at the Democratic National Convention in Boston one way or another. "In the hall or in the parking lot," the Rev. Al said.

After Sharpton's weak showing in the primaries, it looked as if he would be setting up his soapbox among the sport-utility vehicles. But that changed on Thursday when John Kerry brought Sharpton in from the cold.

Who says you can't go though life being a fat, loud thug? And Jesse Jackson is so pissed!

Then there's continuing reverb from Lurch's medal tossing nuancing - Kerry’s ribbons:

The more John Kerry is asked about his Vietnam War medals, the more he resembles Bill Clinton answering questions about Monica Lewinsky.

Maybe Jane Fonda offered to show him her thong! And speaking of old comrades, the North Vietnamese trotted out ole General Giap for a press hoedown - Giap Recalls Vietnam Wins Vs. France, U.S.:

Speaking Vietnamese and French, he was relaxed and animated during a two-hour session, pumping his fist, wagging his finger, cracking jokes, thanking Americans who opposed the Vietnam War, and reminiscing about his days as a fighting revolutionary.

Not surprising since his grand strategy versus the USA was to keep taking punches until his opponent got stabbed in the back. I'm surprised Kerry didn't stop by to wish his old pal the best!

Speaking of which, the newsies were hoping General Giap would offer his sage counsel on Iraq and were rather disappointed that he merely trotted out the party line:

With critics of the Iraq war likening it to America's Vietnam experience, Giap's opinion was eagerly sought, but the man considered one of history's foremost military strategists prefaced his reply with caution, saying he didn't know the specifics of the Iraqi situation.

He offered this: "All nations fighting for their legitimate interests and sovereignty will surely win."

That didn't keep the original AP story from being titled Vietnam's Giap Gives Warning on Iraq and the (Australian) ABC from titling it Vietnamese general warns US doomed in Iraq. It's deja vu all over again!

And speaking of deja vu, from the fever swamps comes some "Dog bites man" news - The Power of a Peace Candidate:

When Ralph Nader announced his independent candidacy for president in February, he claimed his chief target would be "the giant corporation in the White House . . . George W. Bush." Two months later, a more plausible agenda is beginning to emerge. The adversary is not Bush but John F. Kerry; the main subject is not corporate greed but Iraq. And, contrary to the conventional wisdom of win- ter, Nader may be poised for a hot summer.
...
Why should voters choose Nader? Because Kerry, Nader told the reporters, "is stuck in the Iraq quagmire the same way Bush is." That leaves the independent as the sole choice for "the peace movement in this country."

I guess Ralphie's beef is that Lurch has forgotten his roots. C'mon Ralphie - he just has a nuanced approach.