It's Big Boo Hoo Time!

When Bertie first took it on the lam out of Haiti, he was going the martyr route:

"In overthrowing me, they cut down the tree of peace," the exiled leader declared. "But it will grow again, because the roots are well-planted."

Having had time to contemplate the fate of one of his predecessors, he's now got a new story with a little help from his friends:

Jean-Bertrand Aristide said in a telephone interview Monday that he was "forced to leave" Haiti by U.S. military forces.

Aristide was put in contact with The Associated Press by the Rev. Jesse Jackson following a news conference, where the civil rights leader called on Congress to investigate Aristide's ouster.

Jesse! It's a reunion of all the usual suspects.

When asked if he left Haiti on his own, Aristide quickly answered: "No. I was forced to leave.

"They were telling me that if I don't leave they would start shooting, and be killing in a matter of time," Aristide said during the brief interview via speaker phone. He spoke with a thick Haitian accent, his voice obscured at times by a bad connection. It was unclear whether Aristide meant that rebels or U.S. agents would begin shooting.

When asked who the agents were, he responded: "White American, white military.

"They came at night. ... There were too many. I couldn't count them," he added.
...
Aristide on Monday said he was in his palace in Port-au-Prince when the military force arrived. He said he thought he was being taken to the Caribbean island of Antigua, but instead he has been exiled to the Central African Republic.

Aristide described the agents as "good, warm, nice," but added that he had no rights during his 20-hour flight to Africa.

What, no beverage service on the private jet?

Hmm, Bertie needs a little work on the details and it would be better if he had a few bruises from when he was dragged from the palace, but it sounds like he could hit the leftoid rubber chicken circuit for years with this one. In fact, it has already started:

Aristide's wife, Mildred, initiated Monday's telephone call, said Shelley Davis, a special assistant to Jackson. She said the reverend and the president's family have been close for about a decade.

Also Monday, two Democratic congressmen, California's Maxine Waters and New York's Charles Rangel, said they, too, had spoken to Aristide, and he had made similar claims.

Looking good, Bertie! And Jesse is getting ready to run with it:

Jackson said Congress should investigate whether the United States, specifically the CIA, had a role in the rebellion that led to Aristide's exile.

Jackson encouraged reporters to question where the rebels in Haiti got their guns and uniforms.

"Why would we immediately support an armed overthrow and not support a constitutionally elected government?" Jackson said.

Jesse apparently confused "fraudulently" with "constitutionally," but then he's a Democrat.

By the way, if you were wondering where Jesse has been lately, the answer is Libya. Leave no stone unturned!