Saturday, November 29, 2003

Latest news from Burpelson Air Force Base!

General enlists Hollywood to ignite campaign:
In an unlikely attempt to gain star backing for a slow-burning campaign, the Democratic presidential candidate, General Wesley Clark, is spending late nights talking politics with Madonna and wooing sympathetic supergroups such as The Eagles, with whom he recently shared the stage during a rendition of Hotel California.
Late nights with Madonna! Woohoo!
After a 90-minute policy discussion with Madonna in her Los Angeles home recently, a friend of the star was authorised to disclose that "Madonna was very impressed with Gen Clark's intelligence and his vision for America". Another associate added: "Don't under-estimate this. Madonna is often ahead of the curve."
You really can't make this stuff up!
Gen Clark, who had a cerebral and somewhat austere reputation [sic] during his military career, has spent much of the past month seeking out the late-night company of west coast rock stars, screen idols and movie producers. While his rivals preach to the worthy but unglamorous residents of early-voting Iowa and New Hampshire, Gen Clark is dressing snappily and going out on the town in LA.
Party on, Dude!

Do I detect the fine hand of Bubba Clinton?
The showbusiness strategy reflects a change of direction by the Clark campaign team, which has already decided not to compete in the rural Iowa caucuses that launch the primary season.

The general's tacticians believe that Howard Dean, the frontrunner for the Democratic nomination, has already won the support of most left-wing grassroots activists. Gen Clark's goal is to emulate Bill Clinton in the 1990s by capturing the heart of Hollywood, a centre of liberal power and influence in America.

"He wants to be the chosen candidate of Tinseltown," said one sympathetic film producer.
Good luck, Weasley!

But one more vignette:
Gen Clark's Eagles night was judged a political triumph by his team and a model for similar events throughout next year. The group, who hope to influence a future Democratic president on environmental issues, agreed to play for over an hour at the Hollywood fundraiser.

Dressed in black, the general told the audience that Hotel California had been his favourite song since the days of his military service in the state. The Eagles obligingly placed it first on their playlist. According to a campaign aide, "Gen Clark and his wife, Gert, stood by the stage, holding hands and singing along."
It must have been something to see.

More nausea inducing stories by following the link. And by the way, Weasley has noticed that the Hollyweirdos have money.