I'm so surprised!

John Leo at US News:

Which politician emerged from the mess of Katrina as the biggest bonehead involved? No, it's not Michael Brown, George W. Bush, or even the bumbling Louisiana Gov. Kathleen Babineaux Blanco.

The clear winner is New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin, who made every conceivable mistake during the crisis.
...
So today the New York Times has a news profile of the mayor. How does it treat Nagin? You guessed it–he's a hero. The lead of the story is "Hurricane Katrina has given the nation a new political celebrity, the mayor of beleaguered New Orleans." (Nation to city: Can we please give this alleged celebrity back?)

How do the folks at the Times keep a straight face?

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 2:40 PM -

 
Today's Hoot!

Professor Bunyip:

Good manners in our multi-culti age demand that, if you can't say anything nice about another group, then you must say nothing at all -- an observance that has worked mightily to the benefit of soccer. If decent folks were free to speak their minds, they'd concede that it's a decent enough sport for little kids and girls, especially the ones who get their tops off, but somewhat beneath the dignity of men. Once, in less liberated times, the code no doubt served a purpose: a socially acceptable means by which excited men might kiss each other in front of large crowds.

The good professor is a little tough on "snooze ball," but what he is really on about is this year's finals in a real man's sport, Australian Rules Football. It's been centuries since I've seen a game, but I seem to recall that it consists chiefly of a mob of hearty ruffians without pads bashing each other while loosely moderated by guys in white coats waving flags according to some incomprehensible rules. Sort of like a samurai war movie where the troops wear shorts.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:51 PM -

 
I guess Australia doesn't have a pond scum shortage either

Tim Blair:

One in five Labor Party candidates at the last federal election believed the United States was a threat to Australian security, a new study has showed.
...
and one in five said they were either not very proud, or not at all proud, to be Australian.

The US is a threat and Australia is shameful. Nice thinking, dregs.

Sounds like a job description for today's Democrat party in the USA.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 6:12 PM -

 
Another reason to send the Hollyweirdos to Russia!

Want a pirate DVD? Try the secret nuclear bunker:

DURING the Cold War the West spent billions of dollars trying to spy on the military installations of the Soviet Union. Now Western governments are targeting secret Russian military facilities in a new conflict, this time over the piracy of music, films and software.

The Russian Interior Ministry has revealed that millions of pirated DVDs, CDs and CD-ROMs are being produced at factories on secret military facilities beyond the jurisdiction of the police. The ministry said: “Some of the counterfeit production is being made in commercial structures installed in secret and top-secret facilities.”
...
Russian police have had little success in clamping down on the factories, which can churn out an estimated 250 million discs a year, of which 90 per cent are pirated. In a kiosk less than 500 metres from the Moscow office of The Times, Anatoly offered a pirate DVD copy of the Adam Sandler comedy The Longest Yard — released in Britain on September 9 — for only 150 roubles (£3). “Tomorrow I’ll have Revolver,” he said, even though Guy Ritchie’s latest film had its premiere in London only this week.

Industry experts say that of the 42 factories known to be producing bootleg films, music and software at least 12 are on restricted government or military sites, many in or around Moscow. Konstantin Zem-chinkov, the director of the Russian Anti-Piracy Organisation (RAPO), said: “They want to make it difficult for police to come in and raid them. The military knows about it and the Government knows about it.”

The problem, he said, was that much of Russia’s vast military industrial complex was moribund and desperate for cash. “They have to have some money but the Government can’t supply it.”

Maybe the "stars" can put on a benefit show for them?

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 6:00 PM -

 
New Orleans Clown Posse Update!



If you're like me, you just can't get enough of the scamps, scalawags, and scoundrels that populate New Orleans local government. It's like The Three Stooges only with a larger cast!

Anyhow, in the last episode, you may recall that Jefferson Parish President Aaron Broussard was taking some heat for his scenery chewing performance on Meet the Press. It was so bogus that even NBC had to issue a statement, fetchingly titled An emotional moment and a misunderstanding: Story of a mother’s desperate calls from nursing home skewed. I guess that's what the MSM calls pulling one out of your butt. Cut to a Wuzzadem update:

I think it's worth noting that anyone who's watched the interview can plainly see that Broussard is reading from prepared notes throughout. If this was a misunderstanding, it was one that was carefully prepared.

Sheesh, he didn't even learn his lines! Well, I hope he does more prep work before he talks to the Feds about the Jefferson Parish bribery scandal.

And speaking of scandal, the Clown Posse cast just got a new member and he's already off to a good start (H/T: Florida Cracker) - Donations Found at La. Official's Home:

Police found cases of food, clothing and tools intended for hurricane victims at the home of the chief administrative officer for a New Orleans suburb, authorities said Wednesday.

Officers searched Cedric Floyd's home because of complaints that city workers were helping themselves to donations for hurricane victims. Floyd, who runs the day-to-day operations in the suburb of Kenner, was in charge of distributing the goods.

Police plan to seek a charge of committing an illegal act as a public official against Floyd, and more charges against other city workers are possible, police Capt. Steve Caraway said.

The donations filled a large pickup truck four times. "It was an awful lot of stuff," Caraway said.

The donated materials must be processed as evidence but eventually will be distributed to victims. "We have lots of families that are begging for these supplies," said Attorney General Charles Foti, whose office assisted in the investigation.

Let's all give Cedric a warm welcome! Oh, and the garage sale at his place this weekend has been canceled.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:05 AM -

 
Like father, Like son



"There is not a day that goes by without me inhaling the perfume of the discreet violet"

E-Nough! alerts us to some hijinks in high places in France:

Better call Father so he can stop the cops from arresting me.

WHEN Arthur de Villepin was caught by police following a drunken brawl in Paris, he knew there was only one man he needed to call - his father, the French prime minister.
...
Arthur is also a part-time model, posing last year for the Italian designer Krizia, which said it had chosen him for "his natural elegance, his aristocratic beauty and his strong personality despite his young age".

Hit the link for more laughs including the disappearing police records and a photo of the young sprig who seems er, well, rather "ambivalent."

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:48 AM -

 
Maybe Dan Rather could give it a try!

Maybe he already did? Dutch Talk-Show Host to Take Heroin on Air:

AMSTERDAM, Netherlands - A television presenter on a new Dutch talk show plans to take heroin and other illegal drugs on air in a program intended to reach young audiences on topics that touch their lives, producers said Wednesday.

The show, scheduled to premier on late-night television Oct. 10, is called "Spuiten & Slikken," or the "Shoot Up and Swallow" show.

Hey, Hans! That's some really good smack!

The Shoot Up & Swallow show's main hostess will interview guests about drug use and abuse, while Wesselink and another presenter will carry out in-the-field experiments with sex and drugs.

Woohoo! Experiments! No mention of Rock & Roll.

Wesselink, 26, plans to smoke a heroin pill, said Ingrid Timmer, a spokeswoman for the show's producer BNN.

"It's not our intention to create an outcry. We just want to talk about subjects that are part of young people's lives," Timmer said.

Translation: we couldn't think of anything else to do to hype ratings.

In other segments of the show, Wesselink plans to go on a drinking binge in a series of pubs. He also plans to take the hallucinogenic drug LSD — on his couch under the supervision of his mother.

Barfing in the gutter and giant lizards on the ceiling alert! "There, there, Sonny! I won't let the giant lizards bite you." Sheesh, what a bunch of poseurs. But hold on a sec - what happened to the sex?

BNN has drawn viewer complaints for programs in the past, including a sex education program called "This Is How You Screw." One segment discussed how to have sex in a nightclub and featured life-size mannequins with sex organs.

They seem to have a surplus of life-size dummies.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:31 AM -

 
Today's Words of Wisdom

Never shake the bucket of nuts before you're tied to the yak rope.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 5:51 PM -

 
Hey, Ray! This is how it is done.



Since ole Ray Nagin apparently played hooky from Mayor's school on the day they covered evacuations ahead of natural disasters, he might want to pay some attention to the city of Galveston. (Hat tip: rebelbase)

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 4:21 PM -

 
Tears of a Clown

My apologies to Smokey Robinson, but the only other title I could come up with was Old JO gets all sniffly about NJO:

Former CBS News anchor Dan Rather said Monday that there is a climate of fear running through newsrooms stronger than he has ever seen in his more than four-decade career.

Somebody stole the New Year's Eve party fund?

Addressing the Fordham University School of Law in Manhattan, occasionally forcing back tears, he said that in the intervening years, politicians "of every persuasion" had gotten better at applying pressure on the conglomerates that own the broadcast networks. He called it a "new journalism order."

Sounds like another one of Dan's bogus stories. I wonder if someone FAXed him the details from Kinkos?

He said this pressure -- along with the "dumbed-down, tarted-up" coverage, the advent of 24-hour cable competition and the chase for ratings and demographics -- has taken its toll on the news business. "All of this creates a bigger atmosphere of fear in newsrooms," Rather said.

I guess being an egotistical, pompous ass with a mile wide bias and a proclivity for making up stories just doesn't cut it any more.

Rather was accompanied by HBO Documentary and Family president Sheila Nevins, both of whom were due to receive lifetime achievement awards at the News and Documentary Emmy Awards on Monday evening.
...
Nevins took up the cause for Rather, who was emotional several times during the event.

"When a man is close to tears discussing his work and his lip quivers, he deserves bosses who punch back. I feel I would punch back for Dan," Nevins said.

Ruh Oh! Sheila must pull her documentaries out of her butt too.

But not to worry, Captain Dan! There are little people in newsrooms all across America who are following in your footsteps! Take Shadi Rahimi at the New York Times who comes up with beauts like:

Many New Yorkers said yesterday that Ms. Sheehan gave them back hope that was lost when war was declared on Iraq.

The only New Yorkers ole Shadi mentions are the Stalinists that hover around Cindy like flies on a cow flop, but I guess there must have been some more back at the NY Times newsroom. Of course, some of them won't be there too much longer - 'Black Tuesday' Continues: NYT Co. Cutting 500 Jobs. Follow the link for a nice snap of Arthur "Punk" Sulzberger Jr. and the details of the layoffs at the Times and Boston Globe. The reference to "Black Tuesday" is because a number of other big dailies around the country also chose today to announce layoffs. Had to happen - the news is more accurate in the Weekly Shopper and the ads are better.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:20 PM -

 
Today's Hoot!

Don't Get Stuck On Stupid:

New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin held a press conference a little bit ago, and started losing control to a media pool assembled that was showing signs of panic, due to the previous incompetence in the region by the local and state government. Lt. Gen. Russel Honore stepped in and literally took over. Here's what he had to say:

Hit the link for the transcript and audio, but here's the nut:

Male reporter: General, a little bit more about why that's happening this time, though, and did not have that last time...

Honore: You are stuck on stupid. I'm not going to answer that question. We are going to deal with Rita.

I think the General just started a movement, and he may not even realize it. Every time a reporter, in any situation, starts spinning, or completely misses the point, they need to be peppered with, "Don't get stuck on stupid."

I'd pay money to see David Gregory in the White House Press Corps foaming at the mouth over something trivial Scott McClellan said, and have McClellan say, "David, you're stuck on stupid. I'm not going to answer that."

Stuck on stupid and can't find the gear shift. Isn't that the MSM motto?

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:45 PM -

 
Good ole American ingenuity!

Mickey Kaus:

It seems to me, though, that the NYT is missing an obvious, lucrative marketing angle. It would be a variant of the idea my college friend Mark had for a Reverse Record Store--you'd go and pay them $11.99 and they'd take your money and use it (along with the $11.99 payments of others) to bribe Paul McCartney to not make an album that year.

Similarly, imagine TimesDelete: for $19.95 a month, say, TimesDelete's premium subscribers could vote on one op-ed columnist to take an extended vacation. If more people picked Krugman rather than Brooks, Krugman would get his salary plus a bonus on the condition that he maintain a meaningful silence for several weeks. The race would be tight every month, I should imagine, with Republicans and Democrats trying to outvote each other. But you can't play if you don't pay! I'd say this is surefire, supplemental revenue stream would bring in way more than the puny $20 or $30 million dollars a year the Times might hope to make from TimesSelect, especially if the business model were extended to the news pages. Adam Nagourney--your ship has come in!

And why limit it to just one Times scribe? I admit that this plan bears an unfortunate resemblance to the protection racket, but who wouldn't kick in a few bucks to prevent the public simperings of Maureen Dowd?

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 7:47 AM -

 
Today's Hoot!

James Taranto:

The New York Times today began charging for online access to its op-ed and other columnists. Seems to us, though, that the Times Co. is missing out on a gold mine by allowing free access to the Boston Globe's letters to the editor, which are far more entertaining than Paul Krugman and Maureen Dowd. Here's Aline Kaplan of Sudbury, weighing in yesterday:

Conservative friends have been sending me long, detailed e-mails about the government's response to Hurricane Katrina. They are all designed to place the blame on New Orleans Mayor C. Ray Nagin and Louisiana Governor Kathleen Blanco, while exonerating President Bush. These electronic messages have certainly been impressive and revealed previously unknown facts. After reading them, I acknowledge the timelines of what happened, when and who knew what, and when and who signed what and when. My friends are right that state and local government were the first lines of defense--and they failed. This represents a systemic failure of government at all levels.

While their details are valid and their points well made, these are merely the facts.

Today, Jeffrey J. Cymrot of Boston urges surrender:

Though valiant, the president's determination to restore a destroyed city and to rebuild a flood protection system ''stronger than it has ever been" contains within it an arrogance reminiscent of the pharaohs and the kings of antiquity. I consider it unfortunate that occupants of what has become an imperial presidency issue statements such as this, and the citizenry blithely accepts them as ordinary expressions of Pax Americana. I have begun to wonder where this hubris will end.

The gods are angry, and we must appease them!

Hot dang! I knew it was time to break out the virgins!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:22 PM -

 
Help Cindy get her groove back!



Let's face it, a career as a media whore is tough. One day you're the toast of the limousine liberals and mainstream media with catered meals and foot massages; the next you're schlepping around the country in a minivan filled with Stalinists trying to fire up a handful of room temperature IQ wingnuts on street corners. Got to be a downer, right?

Well, ole Cindy Sheehan is trying her best to get back in the limelight, but it just doesn't seem to be working out. First, apparently having never heard of an Arkansas dirt nap, she starts beating up on both Hillary and Bubba Clinton. Then her "big" rally in New York City gets cut off for lack of a permit:

At the conclusion of her speech, from my perspective, a few loud and impassioned boos erupted, then I saw a hand come from behind Cindy and grab her shoulder-strap on her backpack. The arm jerked her backwards, with such force as to snap her head forward, and she fell from my view.

Bummer! She'll sure need a few brewskis back at the Stalinvan after a day like that.

But not to worry, Cindy! Lots of folks are thinking of you and one has made an incredibly worthwhile suggestion - An open invitation to Cindy Sheehan: Please bring Camp Casey up to Chappaqua and set up shop in front of Bill and Hill's Fuehrer Bunker. That'll get Hillary's attention and probably Bubba's too, but watch his hands!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 5:44 PM -

 
Aw Jeez! Not this crap again!



Big Lizards:

Bill Clinton flings his dirt like a monkey with a handful of monkey byproduct, and for the same reason: to mark his territory and ward off enemies -- Republicans who might stand in the way of Billary's return to la Casa Blanca. This is, of course, the open secret we're supposed to forget: that Hillary has designs on the presidency, and that her husband would of course go along for the ride... and possibly even take the wheel when she wasn't looking.

So now, Three-Term Bill suddenly decides that "there was no evidence that there were weapons of mass destruction" in Iraq after all (but read Power Line for a Clinton Cwote from 2003 on that subject), that the military has become too small for the job under George W. Bush (wait -- didn't we use to have sixteen divisions in 1992?), and that we've been "unsuccessful" in Iraq because the proposed Iraqi constitution is not "universally supported" (yes, we've lost the crucial Zarqawi - al Duri vote).

C'mon Bubba! Tell us again how you blew up the aspirin factory!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 4:13 PM -

 
Kind of like a pig in heat

No longer centre stage, but Clinton leaves them calling for more:

If there was any doubt that Bill Clinton still elicits the adoration of women, Barbra Streisand was on hand last week to squash it.

As the former president laid out his agenda for world change from a podium flanked by Tony Blair, Condoleezza Rice and King Abdullah of Jordan, the singer-actress emitted a series of gentle but disconcerting squeals of approval, interspersed with admiring sighs.

No wonder Hillary banned Babs from staying over night at the White House!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 10:03 AM -

 
No need to worry about an idiot shortage!



Mark Steyn has some fun with prize prat, Chuck Schumer:

New York's senior senator, Chuck Schumer, began with some observations about Judge Roberts' "troubling" record on "the issue of civil rights." Ah-ha! "Many of us consider racism the nation's poison," he said sternly. And then he dropped the big one: Twenty-five years ago Roberts had inappropriately used the word "amigos" in a memo.

Woohoo!

I yield to no one in my disdain for Schumer, but at that moment my heart went out to him. If I'd been president, I'd have declared his mouth a federal disaster area and allocated $200 billion so FEMA could parachute in a reconstruction team to restore his tongue to its previous level of toxicity.

He is a national treasure!

Alas, two days later the watery gush that had transformed Schumer into his own devastated wetland had still not dried up. He'd pretty much abandoned the racism angle of the inappropriate "amigos," though he trotted out some boilerplate about how it reflected the "misguided" and "cramped view of civil rights professed in the early Reagan administration." But by Day Four, he'd moved on to "the question of compassion and humanity," telling the judge that he had grave concerns about "the fullness of your heart.''

And what was Exhibit A for the heartlessness of Roberts? Well, back in the early '80s it seems he wrote this memo containing the word "amigos."

Hey, Chuck! What you are you doing with that dead horse?

Oh, dear. With enemies like Chuck, who needs amigos? Whatever happened to the party's fearsome forensic skills at "the politics of personal destruction"? Granted, blathering on about how, if the other guy doesn't agree with your views, he must be deficient in "compassion and humanity" is a lot of baloney even by mawkish Dem standards. But, if you're going to twitter about the fullness of somebody's heart, why get Chuck Schumer to play Senator Oprah? He has the shifty air of a mob accountant, even with every intern on his staff holding onions under his eyes.

That's ole Chuck fer sure.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:24 AM -