Fun at Summer Camp!

Less of Moore:

THERE may soon be less of Michael Moore. The portly propagandist is doing a stint at the Pritikin Longevity Center & Spa in Aventura, Fla. also known as the "fat farm for the rich." Moore is learning how to cook healthy meals and exercise and attending classes on "life re-education."

Mikey's probably real easy with re-education camps. Anyhow, in an exclusive, IowaHawk has Mikey's letters home! See Hello Blubbuh, Hello Flabbah for all the juicy details, but here's a selection:

First, the Pritkin Center is not some cushy "spa" for overweight corporate war profiteers. Think of It as an elite guerilla training center.
...
Cindy also told me not to worry about the $3800 per week training fee. "That's hardly a fraction of what the chickenhawks spent training Casey to die for the Zionist war," she noted. I am humbly dedicating my stay here to Cindy and Casey, and I vow to emerge a slimmer, stronger, more attractive agitator for Truth. See you in a week!
...
There is something very strange going on here. My alarm clock went off at SEVEN FREAKING A.M. this morning, even though I gave the staff strict instructions that I was not to be disturbed before 10:30. The so-called "counselor," Sergio, began barking orders, like a bad cariacture of Curtis LeMay, and forced us down the hallway in an Orwellian march to the dining hall. And I use the term "dining" very loosely. "Breakfast" here apparently means grapefruit and bran flakes, without a single union-made pastry or sausage link to be found.
...
You and I have stood strong against Ashcroft's PATRIOT act and it chilling impact on our liberties. This morning I learned just how fragile those liberties can be. During breakfast weigh-in, Sergio suddenly stopped me -- without probable cause, without so much as a warrant -- and forced me to empty my pockets on a dining hall table. Without even the most basic judicial review or appeal process, he embargoed 6 of my Snickers energy bars, even after I explained I needed the quick energy boost for AM calistenics. Dude, where is my country?

Much more by following the link.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:58 AM -

 
Today's Hoot!

Best of the Web has a lot to choose from, but I liked:

But the press obviously is mistaking Hagel for Hegel and assuming that his maundering must be profound because he is, after all, a great philosopher.

Of course, that's the charitable explanation.

I also admit to a sentimental affection for Kerry Attends Funeral With Blow-Up Sex Dolls.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 7:30 PM -

 
Pesky little varmints, aren't they?

U.N. 'AmBush':

Like John Wayne in a classic Hollywood western, John Bolton has ridden to the rescue at the United Nations with scarcely a moment to spare. As a result, he may just be able to spare America and George Bush the mugging -- let's call it the U.N. AmBush -- that the denizens of the East River have in mind for us next month.

It turns out that, during the months Mr. Bolton was being denied a Senate confirmation vote as the U.S. permanent representative to the United Nations, Kofi Annan's folks and those from other countries who tend to dominate U.N. deliberations (generally, undemocratic and unfriendly sorts) were organizing what might be described as a surprise party for President Bush. The idea was, when he turned up for a special summit meeting from September 14-16, to oblige him to sign on to the most far-reaching -- and outrageous -- U.N. agenda in years. He wouldn't be able to refuse at the last minute, lest he reinforce the rap that he is a "unilateralist cowboy."

The naughty kelptocrats are up to their usual tricks, I see. But I've got a minor question. Ah, here's the answer:

If ever there were proof that President Bush was right to insist on having a U.S. ambassador to the United Nations who represented him and the American people, this document is it. Although press reports and Senate critics of Mr. Bolton claimed that the job was being competently done by Foreign Service professionals, none of them (in New York or Washington) seemed to have any problem with these myriad assaults on this country's policies and interests.

Now that John Bolton is on the job, he is demanding that changes be made to the Outcome Document. The howls can be heard from Turtle Bay to Foggy Bottom. On Aug. 17, Reuters ran as a news article what sounded like a press release issued by the U.N. Association, suggesting that Mr. Bolton is vindicating his critics' complaints about his inability to work-and-play-well-with-others at the U.N. It quoted diplomats as upset that the United States is trying to "return to square one and launch line-by-line negotiations on the document."

About what I'd expect from the "professionals" in the State Department and their peanut gallery.

Here's some of the features the pros were real happy with:

That agenda is laid out in a 40-page paper dated Aug. 5 with the self-important title "Draft Outcome Document of the High-level Plenary Meeting of the General Assembly of September 2005." It reads like a wish-list assembled by advocates of world-government and foes of American sovereignty and power.

For example, the Outcome Document would have us believe that the United Nations has a critical role to play in all world affairs. Reforms it envisions for the institution are largely cosmetic, not the far-reaching, systemic and ongoing ones so clearly required. Support is also given to what amounts to an evolving permanent U.N. army.

Were President Bush to sign on to this document, he would commit the United States to "meeting all commitments and obligations under the Kyoto Protocol." Last time I checked, that was something he has strongly and repeatedly refused to do.

Then there are the disarmament provisions. Signatories would agree to "maintain a moratorium on nuclear test explosions pending the entry into force of the Comprehensive Nuclear-Test-Ban Treaty and call upon all States to sign and ratify" that treaty -- something a majority of the United States Senate refused to do a few years back, judging the treaty to be inconsistent with America's national security interests.

They would also authorize "the commencement, without delay, of negotiations on . . . effective measures for the prevention of an arms race in outer space." Successive U.S. administrations of both parties have opposed such negotiations as incompatible with our need to have assured access to and control of space.

Most egregious of all, perhaps, is the bold grab the Draft Outcome Document makes for "globotaxes" -- the authority to raise revenues for U.N. functions by levying taxes on various international transactions. Obviously aware of the radioactive nature of such an idea with most tax-averse Americans, the drafters have come up with a variety of euphemisms to obscure what they are about: "innovative and additional sources of financing for development on a public, private, domestic or external basis;" "solidarity contributions on plane tickets to finance development projects;" and "other solidarity contributions that would be nationally applied and internationally coordinated."

I love euphemisms. How about a "necktie party" for the civil servants who let this farce proceed this far?

Punch line:

If the U.N.'s planned September AmBush is to be wholly avoided, however, John Bolton will require reinforcements. The House Majority Whip Roy Blunt helped when he secured unanimous agreement in that chamber last month to oppose any U.N .taxes. This legislative prohibition should be enacted as a first order of business when the Senate returns after Labor Day. And, if there is to be an Outcome Document, it had better reflect the sorts of real reforms called for in a House-approved bill sponsored by Rep. Henry Hyde -- and leave out new commitments to development, disarmament and environmental initiatives contrary to this country's interests and, properly, unacceptable to its president.

You can check the document out for yourself here. Time to turn up the heat.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 11:12 AM -

 
Who's the leader of the gang that's made for you and me?



Mickey Moulitsas! And now he's got a secret plan:

Markos “Screw Them” Moulitsas Zuniga has a top secret plan, and it’s coming to fruition in two weeks: Daily Kos: The calm before the storm.

Snort. This oughta be good.

He starts with a quote from the Democratic Leadership Council, who are way too rational for Markos, then informs us that he could rebut their arguments, but you know, like ... why bother, dude?

Then he vows to destroy them.

Salient quote from the fat faced one:

No calls for a truce will be brooked. The DLC has used those pauses in the past to bide their time between offensives. Appeals to party unity will fall on deaf ears (its summer of a non-election year, the perfect time to sort out internal disagreements).

We need to make the DLC radioactive. And we will. With everyones help, we really can. Stay tuned.

Woohoo! He probably wants folks to ask if they can feel his "muscle." Of course, based on his track record, Kos is sorely lacking in the muscle department, in which regard Viking Pundit gets the best line award with a quote from Krusty the Clown.

Anyhow, lgf has started a Kos Kountdown with another fetching photo of the pretentious tyke. Stay tuned for the unfolding wingnut fun!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:12 AM -

 
When you're in construction, there's always problems



Take poor Jaime Gorelick. She spent all that time and trouble building the wall and now it's catching up with her:

The New York Times reports that "an active-duty Navy captain has become the second military officer to come forward publicly to say that a secret defense intelligence program tagged the ringleader of the Sept. 11 attacks as a possible terrorist more than a year before the attacks." According to the officer, Captain Scott Phillpot, "Atta was identified by Able Danger by January-February of 2000." Lt. Col. Anthony Shaffer went public with this story last week, stating that analysts in the Able Danger project had been overruled by military lawyers, pursuant to the "wall" erected by the Clinton administration, when they tried to share the program's findings with the Federal Bureau of Investigation in 2000 in hope of tracking down terror suspects tied to Al Qaeda.

But here's the best part:

In addition, James Smith, a former employee of a defense contractor, says he helped create a chart in 2000 for the Able Danger program that included Mr. Atta's photograph and name. ... Smith says he retained a copy of the chart for some time, posting it on his office wall at Andrews Air Force Base. Ironically, considering the apparent role of the Clinton administration's wall in this story, Smith recalls that the chart became stuck to his wall at the air base, and was impossible to remove when he switched jobs.

Good thing Jaime didn't find out about that!

If the Able Danger story is true, it's a whole new ball game, in more ways than one. And if I were Jamie Gorelick, I'd be quietly applying for Canadian citizenship.

Heck, no! She's planning on being attorney general in the next Donk administration!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 7:45 AM -

 
Today's Hoot!

Greatest Movie Line Ever

(Via American Digest)

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 9:07 PM -

 
I hope she gets a discount on Reynolds Wrap

More words of wisdom from Cindy Sheehan:

Our loved ones have been buried in early graves even as these arrogant thugs parade themselves before the entire world, insisting that democracy is worth dying for, killing for, and destroying entire cities for, all the while they are busy here at home overseeing the emplacement of an electronic voting system that invites fraud at every turn, an electronic vote-counting system that provides no way to validate the votes cast, and that, by it’s very design, prohibits recounting the votes.

For these men to not see to it that our own system of voting and vote-counting is accurate, understandable and verifiable...all the while sending our loved ones to kill and to die so as to establish a democracy in some far away place......this is just one more staggering piece of evidence that the US government is now ruled by murderous hypocrites...criminals who should be arrested, charged appropriately, confined behind bars, and then tried in a court of law...not only here in our own country, but also in all the other countries which have suffered their incomprehensible greed.

In their secret hiding places, while celebrating newly won fortunes with their fellow brass, these men must surely congratulate themselves with orgies of carnal pleasure as they mock the multitudes who are yet so blind as to mistake them for God’s devoted servants.

Woohoo! Now it's "orgies of carnal pleasure." At least there are no flying saucer people. Yet.

Good ole Not Cindy Sheehan seems mild by comparison.

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 1:48 PM -

 
When wingnuts have a falling out

Straight from the horse's orifice:

Socialists expelled from Camp Casey site

On Saturday the 20th, members of the International Socialist Orgnization (ISO) were thrown out of the new Camp Casey site by Crawford law enforcement personnel...

Here's the deal from a DU eyewitness. The ISO set up a table under the new "Camp Two" tent (which is huge) and loaded it with copies of Socialist Worker and Howard Zinn books. They then started peddling their stuff and handing out flyers to advertise the socialist-leaning anti-war protest in DC on September 24. They were eager, if perhaps a little too aggressive in sales, and I was indeed considering buying one of the Zinn books anyway.

No sales resistance I guess. Someone call Amway!

Before I could head back to the booth to actually puchase anything, one of the ISO volunteers jumped on a table and announced to everyone that they were being arrested. Sure enough, there were two or three policemen at the ISO table, and some organizers from Veterans for Peace had joined the growing fracas, with someone from ISO claiming that they were being expelled and/or arrested just for being socialists.

Must be the work of capitalist lackeys!

According to Veterans for Peace spokesmen, the folks from International Socialist Union had indeed gained an interview with Cindy Sheehan and permission to put her statements in Socialist Worker magazine, but Sheehan and the organizers asked the ISO not to set up a banner tent or engage in fundraising at Camp Casey. From what I gathered from the spokesmen, organizations such as CODEPINK and Intelligence Failure that do sell T-shirts and other products at Camp Casey have reached an agreement with Sheehan and the other primary organizers to contribute their profits to the overall effort, which encompasses Crawford Peace House, Gold Star Families for Peace, Veterans for Peace, etc. ISO, on the other hand, had reached no such agreement with the organizers, which meant that all of the money they raised from product sales would go straight into ISO's coffers.

What? I guess it was capitalist lackeys - arguing over the loot. Maybe they could get a bunch of lawyers involved! There's lots of delicious angst in the ensuing discussion until the moderator locked it down.

(Hat tip: FR)

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 8:15 AM -

 
I thought she looked familiar!

(Hat tip: Sacred Cow Burgers)

And speaking of Cindy Sheehan, everyone's favorite drama queen critic, Frank Rich, has his panties in a knot this morning in the New York Times about folks not buying the MSM's carefully constructed fantasy that Cindy Sheehan is an "average American mom". He says it's a vast right wing conspiracy that her nuttiness was revealed. Makes you nostalgic for the old days when you could get away with that kind of snow job, doesn't it Frank?

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 7:34 AM -

 
Headline fun

French countryside hit by a massive invasion of frogs! The article has its moments, too:

Hunters working for the government's wildlife agency will be stalking ponds in south-west France this weekend, aimed (sic) with flash-lights, rifles, silencers and night-vision sights.
...
"It seemed like a rather mean-spirited approach at first but we found that it was the best way of killing all the adults."

Even so, experimental attacks on ponds and lakes over the past 11 months have killed only 120 frogs. A much bigger offensive, starting this weekend, aims to exterminate all the bullfrogs in France within five to 10 years.

Sounds like a quagmire to me!

posted by Cracker Barrel Philosopher at 7:28 AM -