Saturday, August 23, 2008

Obama pranks followers with phony text message


This morning, followers of Barack Obama, who had stayed up all night waiting for a text message from the candidate revealing the name of his running mate, were stunned to get a message naming long time Senator and Washington insider Joe Biden. Expressions of shock and dismay were widespread that the presumptive Democratic presidential candidate who had run on a program of "change" had picked a partner mostly known for his longevity in Washington and his pompous foolishness and occasional plagiarism.

DailyKos Diarist Vera Patchouli summed up the concerns of many ardent Obama supporters when she said (lightly edited):
I can't f***ing believe it. I have been working hard for months for Obama from Mom's basement and he picks this old fart as second in command! The guy who back in 1987 got busted for plagiarizing his speeches from British Labor hero Neil Kinnock. The guy who said Barack was "the first mainstream African American" who was "clean," but that he was completely inexperienced. The guy who said, "You cannot go to a 7-Eleven or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I'm not joking." The guy who has some sort of weird hairpiece stitched into his scalp!

I WANT TO SCREAM! THIS GUY IS A COMPLETE F***ING LOSER!

BARACK, WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO US????????????
Well, Vera need not have worried, because it turns out that the text message was an elaborate prank by Barack Obama and his campaign staff, designed in the words of campaign manager David Axelrod "to see how much BS we could get the Kool-Aid drinkers to believe. It looks like a lot more than we anticipated. I mean, c'mon, who would believe that we would really announce this on a Saturday if it were true?"

Axelrod indicated that the announcement of Obama's real VP candidate would occur next week during the convention. He said, "Whoever the lucky guy or gal is will get a speaking slot at the end just before the janitors start sweeping the floors."